Thursday, 29 May 2008

The Clothes I Wear

What others see from your style:

Although to the untrained eye you may seem like a plain dresser who avoids trends, you actually wear carefully designed accessories and clothes that emphasize your uniqueness. You value your freedom and have an artistic mind. You are neither aggressive nor timid, but you believe in yourself.

What your nightclothes reveal:

You're in need of love. You want to be taken care of and panic easily. You have a strong wish for security in your life.

What others see from your ties:

You are a caring people. You are romantic, witty, and easygoing. You compromise rather than confront, and love nature.

What others see from your belts:

If there's not a single belt in your wardrobe, you like freedom and are opposed to all kinds of rules. You are creative and very good at work that requires you to stretch your imagination. Your main downfall, however, is that you can be very moody.

What others see from your shoes:

You are a person who loves simplicity and is sincere and open. You are pleasant to be with, easygoing and always in a good mood. You neither want to control nor be under someone else's control. You don't care much about how you look, and know that it's what's inside someone's heart that's important.

What others see from your earrings:

You are a sweet and talkative person. You are sociable, energetic and interesting, and get easily bored by the same old things. You are always looking for adventure.

The last analysis:

You are probably a romantic and passionate person. You are sensitive and lonely when you aren't in love. You can be somewhat self-centered, but you are honest and sincere to others. You like to make a good impression of yourself and worry about what others think of you.

all this comes from one of those random blog quizzes that could be actually nice and sometimes surprising. only this because i lack inspiration and motivation to write anything or blog. maybe tomorrow...

Wednesday, 28 May 2008

How well do you get along with others?

Here is the analysis:

You truly believe in friendship. You get along well with others, and those who are around you are happy to be with you, too. You love to be surrounded by friends and you'll do anything you can to help them without expecting anything in return. When your friends are smiling, you're as happy as you can be.

Sunday, 25 May 2008

updating myself..

"omg! where have i been? and what exactly have i been doing?" yes, that's the question that i have been asking myself. that's not only me feeling that way. i had a good conversation with a close friend yesterday and it seems the time is passing by so quickly that certain things that we love to do are slipping our hands.

this year's american idol is david cook! woohoo! i am so happy. this is the first time i am excited about any winner of american idol, since i started watching from season 3. when i first found out about it, i kinda screamed! (actually i really screamed!) and wanted to jump up and down. (ok, so i did do that too..) i was so happy that day, my friends would be my proof to that day where i was just laughing, smiling and my voice was just so high pitched, that it was so funny. i'm sure it was infectious. i'll be looking forward to buying his album soon. for now, i'll just be listening to billie jean, all i really is you, the time of my life, i'm alive, and of course, always be my baby.. (obviously that's not all..and david vs david is another topic..)

i want a secret garden, my secret garden. you know when sometimes you wanna be by yourself and reflect in your own home, you go hide in your toilet. because that's the only room in your house that you're definitely by yourself and no one would come in. i want my secret garden where i could do the same thing when i'm all alone in my toilet. come on, it's definitely prettier than any toilet.

long walks do me good. i just long walks. especially when you're in the mood to reminisce, look back, think, be sentimental, reflect and remember.. i like the walking by river thames especially. good thing we live near river thames, long walks do me good and the river thames, well water looks so relaxing and peaceful.

emotions. questions about emotions. the truth. the brain, the mind. the heart. control. friends, company. laugh, smile. inspire. hugs. comfort. tears. take risks. take chances. hurt. scared. good. doubt. uncertainty. thinking. feelings. him, her, me.
let the words come together. you pick which makes sense. go figure.

Wednesday, 7 May 2008

scribbles vol.1

scribble v. write hastily or illegibly; make meaningless or illegible marks
n. something scribbled

i can't help but scribble away since my mind is full of them, so i write it down on whatever paper i can find and i try to put them together in the best way possible. and so far, all i have is below. some of them are not finished. i will put the rest tomorrow. :)

with a heavy heart
i have trouble breathing
one, breathe in slowly
i close my eyes
two, breathe out
and then open
relax, i tell myself
just relax
everything will be okay.
it should so it will be.

what's happening to me
i seem to be losing it
something's gotta be wrong
i'm not myself anymore
i'm reckless and yet very careful
i'm in a hurry and yet there's still time
but then i've been wasting too much time
so i'm just chasing something
that left me behind

lost in a daydream
staring into nothingness
i look at him beside me
he's as lost as i am
can't help but smile

i just want to write
my mind is screaming
my thoughts are floating
time is passing by

i'm staring at the board
all i hear and see are numbers
but all i can think of are words
all meaningless unless put together
so i'm trying to make them rhyme

is there any given formula
in creating the perfect rhyme

is there any hidden recipe
in cooking up the perfect lines
we pour in a cup of emotion
fill in in with the right words
and sprinkle it with inspiration

let me just write
i have to let this all out
this may not make sense
let's just do this freestyle
my heart is beating fast
my head seems to be spinning
my hand is shaking
and i just feel like crying
i want to shout
i want to scream
i want to break free
let go of everything
there's no holding back
who cares who's watching
let them stare in disbelief
they don't need to understand
i stop to think
i need some rest
my mind is wondering
i could fall asleep
i want to run away
hide until all this is over
i don't have te strength to fight this
i'm even losing some faith
this can't really be happening
this is not really me
i know i'm stronger than this,
better than this
but i can't just see me right now
i'm afraid, i'm scared, i'm terrified
not sureof what to say, what to do
confused and drowning in my thoughts
someone pull me out of it, please

Friday, 2 May 2008

logging in.

i'm back to blogger mode. yes, after almost two weeks that i have been missing in action, i finally have time to this. will be posting all that i have written very soon. oh i miss this. :)

so where do i start?

hardwork. dedication. detachment. challenges. believe. busy. time. hope. change. different. focus. support. smile. trust. faith. love. friends. family. God. me.

words that could describe my almost non-existence to other people for two weeks. i choose to disconnect because i decided to focus on my studies. and hopefully it paid off. i even got sick because of all the stress and pressure and late nights. but i'm really grateful to everyone who stuck with me and supported me and pushed me a little to hold on and finish till the end. i'm also thankful for Superfriend, for i know He's always there for me, and i trust Him to be always there.

being smart doesn't mean that i can easily get the grades i want or simply get anything and anywhere i want. it doesn't mean that i get the easiest path or fastest path to where i want to be or what i can become. being smart sometimes means that i have to work harder, run a mile longer, walk faster and reach higher goals.

Thursday, 1 May 2008

quotable quotes from the movies 2

second installment of some memorable quotes from the movies. for the moment, it's all i can do. :)

"Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion's starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don't see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often it's not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it's always there - fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge - they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I've got a sneaky feeling you'll find that love actually is all around."

"You cannot leave everything to Fate, boy. She's got a lot to do. Sometimes you must give her a hand."

"Johnathan Trager, prominent television producer for ESPN, died last night from complications of losing his soul mate and his fiancee. He was 35 years old. Soft-spoken and obsessive, Trager never looked the part of a hopeless romantic. But, in the final days of his life, he revealed an unknown side of his psyche. This hidden quasi-Jungian persona surfaced during the Agatha Christie-like pursuit of his long reputed soul mate, a woman whom he only spent a few precious hours with. Sadly, the protracted search ended late Saturday night in complete and utter failure. Yet even in certain defeat, the courageous Trager secretly clung to the belief that life is not merely a series of meaningless accidents or coincidences. Uh-uh. But rather, its a tapestry of events that culminate in an exquisite, sublime plan. Asked about the loss of his dear friend, Dean Kansky, the Pulitzer Prize-winning author and executive editor of the New York Times, described Jonathan as a changed man in the last days of his life. "Things were clearer for him," Kansky noted. Ultimately Johnathan concluded that if we are to live life in harmony with the universe, we must all possess a powerful faith in what the ancients used to call "fatum", what we currently refer to as destiny."

"I believe we write our own stories. And each time we think we know the end - we don't. Perhaps luck exists somewhere between the world of planning, the world of chance, and in peace that comes from knowing that you just can't know it all. You know, life's funny that way. Once you let go of the wheel, you might end up right where you belong."

"Summer romances end for all kinds of reason. But, when all is said and done, they have one thing in common - they are shooting stars, a spectacular moment of light in the heavens, a fleeting glimpse of eternity and in a flash they are gone."

"Sometimes I wonder about my life. I lead a small life. Well, not small, but valuable. And sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it, or because I haven't been brave? So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around? I don't really want an answer. I just want to send this cosmic question out into the void. So good night, dear void."

"Winning that ticket, Rose, was the best thing that ever happened to me... it brought me to you. And I'm thankful for that, Rose. I'm thankful. You must do me this honor, Rose. Promise me you'll survive. That you won't give up, no matter what happens, no matter how hopeless. Promise me now, Rose, and never let go of that promise."

"If there's any kind of magic in this world, it must be in the attempt of understanding someone, sharing something. I know, it's almost impossible to succeed, but...who cares, really? The answer must be in the attempt."

"Dear Annette, I don't know what I could possibly say that would rectify the harm I've caused you. The truth of the matter is that being with you was the only time I have ever been happy. My whole life has been a joke. I prided myself on taking joy in others' misery. Well, it finally backfired. I succeed in hurting the first person I ever loved. Enclosed is my most prized possession. My journal. For a long time I considered it my trophy. A sordid collection of my conquests. If you really want to know the truth than please read it. No more lies. Please give me another chance. I'm a wreck without you."

"Michael...I've loved you for nine years, I've just been too arrogant and scared to realize it, and... well, now I'm just scared. So, I realize this comes at a very inopportune time but I really have this gigantic favor to ask of you. Choose me. Marry me. Let me make you happy. Oh, that sounds like three favors, doesn't it?"

"The whole purpose of places like Starbucks is for people with no decision-making ability whatsoever to make six decisions just to buy one cup of coffee. Short, tall, light, dark, caf, decaf, low-fat, non-fat, etc. So people who don't know what the hell they're doing or who on earth they are can, for only $2.95, get not just a cup of coffee but an absolutely defining sense of self: Tall. Decaf. Cappuccino. "

"The best love is the kind that awakens the soul; that makes us reach for more, that plants the fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. That's what I hope to give you forever."