Friday, 27 July 2007


v., rant·ed, rant·ing, rants.
To speak or write in an angry or violent manner; rave.

It is something that usually happens in blogs. People write stuff in their blogs. They rant. In this such blog entries, feelings - emotions are just being poured out. When a person feels the urge to let it all out, all the words just come out naturally. There is no more thinking for the right words to say or how the words are to come out or how you want the sentence to sound like. Usually words unsaid and unheard are put into blogs for everyone to read. Of course, details may sometimes not be given out as to who the whole message is for. People who read it, just have so-called gut feelings that it is about them or who it really is for or about.

They do this because it is their way of letting it all out. Simply outpouring. While others cry, pick a fight, get drunk, smoke or talk. There is nothing wrong with it. It's some kind of therapy. It's some kind of communication bridge to get points across. To let everything out in the open without fear of the way people concerned would react. Things may get better or worse. While things can also just remain the same. Certain things also just end and are forgetten.

One common topic people usually rant about are relationships. It's really painful when romantic relationships end. However we never stop to think about when friendships end. Right now, I couldn't afford to lose a friend, any friend in my life. For certain reasons, some of us may have drifted apart for obvious reasons. But it doesn't mean the friendship between us has ended. Dealing with a broken friendship can be alot more messy and a lot more painful. This is something I have realized recently. It may not have happened to me personally but I understand how it feels. For I almost lose mine way back when.

Oh my, this entry is different from the others. It just seems so - so formal. Don't know if that's the right word to describe it. But just look at it. Argh. I think i woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. I'm just not myself and my feelings are just blank. Although my mind is just filled so many thoughts. Got nothing better to do than this. So just let me rant.

Thursday, 26 July 2007

What Does Your Birth Date Mean For Your Love Life?

Your Birthdate: November 16
Calm and understated, you struggle to express your love with words. Over time, your partner learns to recognize your passion by the actions you take. You're good at wooing someone slowly, without them even realizing it!

Number of True Loves You'll Have: 5

Number of Times You'll Have Your Heart Broken:

You are most compatible with people born on the 7th, 16th, and 25th of the month

reaction: hahahahaha! loved the number of times i'll have my heart broken and number of true loves. since it totally contradicts what has been said in the other entry on my birthday. hahahaha!

Friday, 20 July 2007

thoughts for today.

i thought summer is finally here. but when i woke up this morning, and looked out, i can hardly see the building at the other side. due to rain. pouring rain.

i thought the bad wierd dreams had stopped. but why do they keep coming back. it creeps me out. i don't want them anymore.

and lastly, i thought something's wrong with me today. what's happening to me? here i was watching a new couple together so sweet. and tears just started to fall. for no specific reason. they just did. after so long. and i couldn't stop it.

was it because i was happy for them?
did i miss that or somebody?
did i want that?
was i still sad?
did i want someone beside me now?

oh no, help.
can someone please tell me what is that all about?

Tuesday, 17 July 2007

what is in a name?

"What's in a name? That which we call a rose. By any other name would smell as sweet."

oh, i miss being called anakat (& nekat as well). nowadays, it's either anna or kat. never really said together. unless i chat or talk with a friend from back home. but that's not everday.

it's a common problem with people. to keep getting my name mixed up. sometimes it's annoying really. for example, it happened every retreat in high school. we used to give out retreat letters to our friends. and in all of the retreat letters i receive, the topic was either about my lovelife or math and 'have i spelled your name right?'. anakat is spelled like annakat or anakatt or even annakatt. well the same thing happens when spelling my name katrina, people spell with an 'h' (kathrina) or with a 'c' (catrina) or worse, with both (cathrina). oh my, my name has really so many versions. and that's just the spelling. imagine people calling me different names. like mixing me and my sister's names, and calling me carmina. then there's katherine, carmela, carmila. even my nickname has different version, hmm.. anadog, anacow, bananabat. (the funny ones.) and the list simply goes on and on.

well i guess that's how it is for everyone. maybe at the beginning atleast. most new people you meet would probably just know you by your face. or others just by your name. and maybe it's alot worse if people mistake you with another person.

i miss being called anakat. oh, did i say that already? i guess i just got so used to people calling me that. i miss introducing myself as anakat. now, it's 'hi, i'm anna.' or 'katrina po.' and of course, i respond to that now. it's just different. new life, new name, new person?

funny when i think about it, is that like they're two different people. actually it's like saying i have dual personalities, two lives. which i don't think i have for that's far too complicated. i just don't want anakat to be another memory. you know, i just don't want to go 'oh anakat, that's what people used to call me in high school, way back when.'

Sunday, 15 July 2007

all in a day's work.

oh my, what a day! actually more like, what a weekend! this year's barrio fiesta in hounslow was so much fun. it was really tiring but i'm super happy.

where do i begin? hmm.. well, who doesn't fun in barrio fiestas? it's not only in the philippines where we filipinos enjoy fiestas. but it has been brought here to london as well. and that's one thing i like about this kind of events. you have loads of fun. this is the time where you get the chance to be around thousands of filipinos which make you feel like you're back home in the philippines. and you wouldn't feel so lost in a foreign land.

i was helping out in my dad's booth. and i enjoyed it. dealing with people. giving out fliers and souvenir packs. having them complimenting my work. going on the parade as well as sideline photographer. and at the same time, laughing, eating for free (ehem, partner, ehem..Ü), joking around and lots of bonding moments (sino may gusto ng masahe? uhm, john? hehe.Ü). all good fun happy memories. i'll gladly do it again next year, for simply wonderful things come out of it.

so while waiting for next year, right now, all i can think about is what happened this past weekend. and i can't help but smile. actually i simply can't stop. so i'll just put my feet up on my bed and rest for this will be such a sweet hangover.

Friday, 13 July 2007

harry potter stuns..

The Rebellion Begins. for Evil Must Be Confronted.

stupefy! wahaha.. just watched the 5th movie of harry potter with my friends. (namely veronica, sonia and marion. just in case, they complain i didn't put their names here. peace guys!Ü) and as of atleast five minutes ago, i've watched it twice. the second time online. anyways, it was a good movie. we only felt it was cut short. we wanted more. we expected more. especially from the ending. it was like, "oh my, it's finished already?" hahaha! it ended with harry potter saying "something worth fighting for". *sigh*

what else can i say about the movie? well, let's see. hmm.. the kiss between harry potter and cho chang? uhm, it was okay? hehe. oh, i like the room of requirement. i would have lots of uses for that room. hehehe. and harry potter. oh my, he was so skinny. and he seemed so small. hehe. and for a teenager in the film, he was wearing a lot of polo shirts that make him look so much older.

well i guess we were just so engrossed and so into the movie, we didn't talk much. aside from the occasional side comments and laughing. hehe. one more thing, i just feel sad i didn't get to finish my chicken. haha! oh well..Ü

Saturday, 7 July 2007

What Kind of Smile are You?

You're the loving smile,the one that is entirely devoted to others,especially that one person.You really can't get them out of your head,but then,you don't really want to.

Take this quiz!


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Tuesday, 3 July 2007

all there is.

last day of college. i've finished my first year in college. everything turned out better than expected. after summer, 2nd year kicks in and then off to university. and that's another three years of my stay here. but this is not about the future. this is about looking back at the school year that has gone by. cherish the memories. that is something i have learned through the years. and something i keep doing these days. hay seems like yesterday i first came up those steps at hammersmith. and finally, after a year (well ten months to be exact.), i find myself walking down from the college and look around to know that i don't be here for atleast two months. it's no secret that i don't like my college. one thing all of us agree on but we sure are lucky enough to have each other in college. however, i would still miss it. during the short walk out of college, flashbacks of the year that has passed came to me. happy, sad, crazy, wierd, fun, promising, firsts, changes. and at the same time, kelly clarkson's breakaway was playing on my ipod. just the right feel-good song. with the wind blowing, i feel light. and i am happy.

so i say to the sky, rain on me now. for i wouldn't care. because just for today, nothing or no one can take that smile off my face.