scribbles vol.1

scribble v. write hastily or illegibly; make meaningless or illegible marks
n. something scribbled

i can't help but scribble away since my mind is full of them, so i write it down on whatever paper i can find and i try to put them together in the best way possible. and so far, all i have is below. some of them are not finished. i will put the rest tomorrow. :)

08.41
with a heavy heart
i have trouble breathing
one, breathe in slowly
i close my eyes
two, breathe out
and then open
relax, i tell myself
just relax
everything will be okay.
it should so it will be.

08.46
what's happening to me
i seem to be losing it
something's gotta be wrong
i'm not myself anymore
i'm reckless and yet very careful
i'm in a hurry and yet there's still time
but then i've been wasting too much time
so i'm just chasing something
that left me behind

16.49
lost in a daydream
staring into nothingness
i look at him beside me
he's as lost as i am
can't help but smile

i.
i just want to write
my mind is screaming
my thoughts are floating
time is passing by

ii.
i'm staring at the board
all i hear and see are numbers
but all i can think of are words
all meaningless unless put together
so i'm trying to make them rhyme

iii.
is there any given formula
in creating the perfect rhyme

iv.
is there any hidden recipe
in cooking up the perfect lines
we pour in a cup of emotion
fill in in with the right words
and sprinkle it with inspiration

14.39
let me just write
i have to let this all out
this may not make sense
let's just do this freestyle
my heart is beating fast
my head seems to be spinning
my hand is shaking
and i just feel like crying
i want to shout
i want to scream
i want to break free
let go of everything
there's no holding back
who cares who's watching
let them stare in disbelief
they don't need to understand
i stop to think
i need some rest
my mind is wondering
i could fall asleep
i want to run away
hide until all this is over
i don't have te strength to fight this
i'm even losing some faith
this can't really be happening
this is not really me
i know i'm stronger than this,
better than this
but i can't just see me right now
i'm afraid, i'm scared, i'm terrified
not sureof what to say, what to do
confused and drowning in my thoughts
someone pull me out of it, please